In the two-minute clip directed by Doug Inglish, Maxim's very own "Special Lifestyle Editor" slowly emerges from the water in an immediately familiar-looking red bikini.
Alessandra gives us her best slow-mo striptease, rekindling fond memories of one of the most paused moments in VHS tape history.
See how Alessandra stacks up to Phoebe's O.G. scene here:
Really, the only thing missing is the slow-burn synths of The Cars' "Moving In Stereo."
And while we're at it, here's some wonderfully watery pics from Alessandra's most recent Maxim cover shoot. You're welcome.