3 Mysteries Way More Interesting Than Jimmy Hoffa

Surprise! The latest investigation has turned up nada.

Surprise! The latest investigation has turned up nada.

As the continuing saga of the former union boss continues with yet another failed search attempt, it’s important to recognize the way weirder mysteries and missing peoples than Jimmy Hoffa. We’re talking people you probably have never heard of. Like, you’re probably just into mainstream disappearances like Hoffa and whatever (yes, you can get hipsterish about kidnappings). Likely murdered by the Mob, Hoffa’s remains have been searched for in fields, junkyards, barns, farms, and even under some poor guy’s driveway. And each and every quest ends in a snooze fest. So maybe the FBI should take a look into a few of these other whodunits?

Photo by MPI/Getty Images

The Disappearance of Ron Tammen

As chronicled here by the Miami Student – “the oldest newspaper in the country” (in your fucking face, Roanoke Picayune!) – Tammen was an all-around swell fella who, between visits to the malt shop, dances at the sock hop, and communist hunts, simply up and vanished from his university dorm room in 1953. So what makes it creepy? Hints of Skull & Bones-style fraternity lunacy, the fact that Tammen’s dorm was a former insane asylum, and theories that he was recruited by the CIA and disappeared.

The Disappearance of Tara Calico

In 1988, teenager Tara Calico disappeared somewhere along her usual morning bike ride in Belen, New Mexico. Whether it was an abduction, runaway, or terrible accident, neither the family nor the authorities had any clue as to what actually happened…until June 15, 1989, when a woman in Florida, stopping at a local gas station, noticed a white van burn rubber leaving the parking lot. Heading over to investigate what looked like a piece of paper dropped from the van, she found (if you are partial to nightmares, do not click) this, a photograph of a girl and a boy, bound and gagged with tape. The girl would come to be identified at Calico, while the boy remains a mystery to this day. Numerous red herrings and strange claims by the lead detective on the case followed – he knew who did it, but couldn’t do anything about it because of the statute of limitations (of which there is none in these kinds of cases) – but no further evidence or suspects have ever been revealed. Actor RJ Mitte (Breaking Bad) is attempting to put together a documentary about the case.

The Disappearance of Richard Colvin Cox

The only West Point cadet to ever go missing without being discovered (dead or alive), Rich was additionally unfortunate enough to have parents willing to name him Dick Cox (c’mon guys, even in 1928 you had to have known). Before entering the officer academy at West Point, Cox served in army intelligence in West Germany just after the end of WWII. On January 7, 1950, the West Point barracks received a call from a man calling himself “George,” who said to the answering cadet, “When he [Cox] comes in, tell him to come on down here to the hotel… just tell him George called – he’ll know who I am. We knew each other in Germany. I’m just up here for a little while, and tell him I’d like to get him a bite to eat.” Cox met with “George” that night and two more times. Cox’s friends said that Cox would talk about “George” but never by name, saying he was a former army ranger who killed Germans and mutilated their genitals during the war. Cox even claimed “George” had impregnated a German girl and murdered her to prevent the birth. On the third visit with “George,” both men walked off the West Point campus and were never seen again. How is this not a Christopher Nolan movie? (It is a book, however.)

Hope you enjoyed those mysteries as much as you’ll enjoy what will surely be an awesome night’s sleep totally not punctuated by nightmares about white vans.

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