The 2013 NFL Big 5: Week 9

We’re halfway through football season – should you wake up for it?

The new NFL week is here and with it comes chaos. Fortunately, Maxim is here to help you navigate these uncharted waters with five predictions that will undoubtedly (or just maybe) come true.

(Photo: Hannah Foslien/ Getty Images | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2013)

Big Upset – Minnesota over Dallas

This is certainly not a favorable matchup for the Vikes. From a worn-out defense that did all it could to hang on to Jared Allen to a week-to-week QB situation to an OC who still, somehow, refuses to put the ball in AD’s hands, Minny doesn’t seem to be carrying too much confidence into Dallas. However, the Vikings do have some sparks (such as the remarkable dynamic Corderrelle Patterson bolstering a WR corps that includes Greg Jennings), and the deflating loss against Detroit last week is probably still hanging pretty visibly in the Cowboys’ psyche.

Big Performance – Andy Dalton

When does the world start talking about how good this guy actually is? Any QB would benefit from having a guy like A.J. Green, but not every QB can make a guy like Marvin Jones seem so huge with nothing but a little double coverage on the other side of the field. He’s shredded up defenses for all of October and will probably do the same to a Miami Dolphins team that lacks confidence (and a sense of humor).

Big Flop – Pittsburgh D

“Hey guys, if the Miami D can hold them to three points in the first half, why can’t we totally shut them down? We’re really good on paper!” – The soon to be disappointed Pittsburgh defense. Tom Brady has been far too un-Bradyish for far too long; it’s going to turn around at some point, and we’re guessing it’s this week.

Big Storyline – Lots of Byes

Hang in there, fantasy footballers – this is the last six-team bye week. After this it’s smooth sailing. Except for when you play Megatron. Then you’re fucked.

Big Stinker –All the Early Games

West Coasters (and unemployed/hard-partying East Coasters): Get as drunk as you’d like on Saturday – there is a pathetic slate of early games just begging to be slept through. 

Check out 6 Athletes Who Should Quit Their Day Jobs and The 2013 NFL Big 5: Week 8