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Answering all the stupid questions you never knew you had (and some you did).


Eric Brawn, via e-mail

That rhymes! Also, yes, we can already. Here’s how the BrainGate Neural Interface System will put your thumbs to pasture.

First, a 4 mm microchip is implanted in the motor cortex, the area of the brain that controls voluntary movement.

2. Electrodes on the chip detect the nerve impulses your brain usually sends to your limbs.

3. Those impulses are sent through a cable to a nearby computer, which translates the

signals based on pattern recognition (“move thumb sideways” has a signature, for example).

4. Those translated directives are then given to an object in the nearby game, in this case a Pong paddle. Awesome! (Unfortunately, you have to be paraplegic to use it. Still, though…awesome!)

Fast Facts

Tasty tidbits about turkey day!

  • 250 million turkeys were raised in the United States in 2009.
  • Turkey, Texas (pop. 456) is the most populous of the three towns in the nation named after the bird.
  • 709 million pounds of cranberries were produced last year.
  • The first Thanksgiving feast occurred in Newfoundland in 1578, not in Plymouth in 1621.
  • The USDA advises storing the raw turkey, duck, and chicken no longer than two days before cooking a turducken.

6= The age at which your personality is set for life, says a recent study from the University of California. So That must be why we still want to have sex with Cheetara from Thundercats, right? right?!


Can you dive into a pool of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck?

John McDonald, Irving, TX

Sure, but it might be painfully similar to diving headfirst into concrete, according to chemist David Lever at Ohio Wesleyan University. The coins would lock together and form a solid surface that, if you chose to dive into, would snap your neck. It’s probably not safe to keep your life savings in a giant vault with a money symbol on it, either.

You Didn’t Ask, but We’re Telling You Anyway

Knowledge you’ll wish you never had!

According to the dating experts at OkCupid, iPhone owners score more tail than users of any other cell phone. Male iPhone owners averaged 10 sexual partners, and lady Apple fans averaged an impressive 12.3. Using an Android phone? Sucks to be you and your measly mean of six boning buddies.