Chris Jericho Talks Sex Robots, The WWE, and “Jizzing It Up, Bro”
The WWE legend – and star of Jon Davis Gets A Sex Robot – also answers the same 10 questions we always ask everyone!
Photo: Ethan Miller / Getty Images | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2013
You’re starring in a new web series called Jon Davis Gets A Sex Robot. How did you get involved with that?
It actually all came about through Eli Roth, who introduced me to Jon Davis, who I hung out with a few times – he was a screenwriter in Hollywood, one of those guys that’s always been around doing stuff for years. He was hooked up with somebody that was involved with Justin Lin’s new YouTube Channel, YOMYOMF – which stands for You Offend Me, You Offend My Family, which must be some kind of a Bruce Lee thing. They were looking for content, and one thing led to another. He had this debate with his wife whether if sex robots ever became a thing, could he get one? Then he actually wrote a script based around that concept. When I read the script for it, I was kind of intrigued by the title of it, and how funny it ended up being. It’s very vulgar in parts but it’s also very heartwarming, which is why it works.
In your first episode, it seems like you really enjoy repeating the words, “huge natural boobs.”
Any scene that you’re talking about huge natural boobs is always a winner. The cool thing about my character is that he’s a total scumbag, douchebag type of guy, kind of a horny roommate that just can’t believe the fact that Jon Davis actually has a sex robot and is having moral issues with it. He’s like, “You know it’s a robot, you have to have sex with it. It’s like a lawnmower; you have to cut the grass with it. You don’t have to have emotional attachments to it.”
You’ve always been fond of bringing comedy into the wrestling ring. If you had to choose between comedy, wrestling, and your band, Fozzy, how tough is that call to make?
If I had to drop one of them, I don’t know if I could do the other two, because they’re all kind of intertwined. It’s all show business, it’s all part of being a showman in the year 2013. You’re always going to have the sticklers and the haters that are like, “Yo, you’re a wrestler, you can’t do anything else.” And those are the people that, if that’s the way you feel, then fine, go fuck yourself – if you don’t like it, step aside and let the people that do like it get a better seat.
As far as your wrestling career goes, who is the best opponent you’ve ever worked with?
Probably Shawn Michaels. I think he’s probably the best total package wrestler of all time – he could do it all, and was a big influence of mine when I was first starting. That storyline, the feud I had with him in 2008, that was one of the best programs not just in my career, but in the entire history in of the WWE. It’s always cool when you start out as a fan and then become an ally where you’re working together. It’s the same with music – Fozzy toured with Metallica, and it was like, “Here I am with the band that influenced me to get into music.”
Some WWE fans have complained in recent years that the company seems to really push huge guys that can’t actually wrestle all that well, at the expense of experienced all-rounders, like yourself. What’s your take on that?
I don’t see it that way. Wrestling is all about new talent and new turnaround of the stars. I could be the main event guy there for 20 years, but there’s going to have to be other guys that come into that picture or else it’s pretty boring and business will go really bad. There’s only so much Jericho or so much HHH or so much Rock people can take. So you try different guys – some of them are bigger and don’t really have the talent, they have more of the look. Some guys are small and go against the traditional WWE superstar, but yet are so damn good they make it to the top – I’m talking about guys like Eddie Guerrero, or even Shawn Michaels or Daniel Bryan right now. You have guys who would never be the typical WWE superstar, but because they were so damn good, they would rise to the top of the mountain. You have to realize that if you have 60 guys on the roster, the WWE is going to try and get every one of those 60 guys to world championship level. Some of them will make it, the majority won’t, but until you try, you just never know. Everyone’s got to get a full chance, if not, why are they even there on the payroll?
Are you going to write a third installment of your biography?
I’m supposed to be writing that right now, but it’s hard to kind of step into it. I’ve been so busy over the last year with all the different projects that I’m doing. I just have to get my ass moving here and get it rolling.
Have you ever Wikipedia’s yourself? Because you have the most amazingly cheesy photo for your profile picture.
That’s great! I haven’t Wikipedia’d myself recently. I Google myself from time to time, usually at night, but no, I haven’t Wikipedia’d myself. I don’t know who put the photo up, but if it’s cheesy, that’s even better. I’d rather have a cheesy picture up there than have something where I’m trying to look serious and mean.
It’s just a huge grin and a thumbs up.
Oh, well, perfect, man, that sums me up. Like I said, that’s the personality of Jericho. That’s why I’m able to play the guy who’s big catchphrase on Jon David Gets A Sex Robot is, “Jizz it up, bro!” That’s my motto, “Jizz it up, bro.” They actually made a T-shirt for it. I just found it in my closet the other day, I was like, “Ah, that’s great, I thought I lost it!” When the show becomes a huge Internet sensation, I’m going to eBay my Jizz It Up, Bro! T-shirt for thousands, possibly millions.
AND NOW: CHRIS JERICHO ANSWERS THE SAME 10 QUESTIONS WE ALWAYS ASK EVERYONE!
What was the last thing you had to apologize for?
To my wife, probably last night just for whatever – you know how it is when you’re a husband you’re always getting in trouble for something. And you don’t even really know the reason, you just apologize and get it over with, move on. So, I apologized for something I didn’t do, even though I did it.
What’s your favorite curse word?
Jizz it up! It’s funny, I took my 9-year-old son to see Black Sabbath two nights ago – kind of a bad parental decision when Ozzy’s the front man and his opening line is, “C’mon you fuckers! I want a wild fucking crowd!” It’s like, “Oh no…” So it was a very uncomfortable hour or so until we basically had to get up and leave. So at that point my least favorite curse word was definitely the F-word as said by Ozzy.
What’s the worst hangover you’ve ever had?
I remember one time, it was before the very first Thunder, which was a WCW show, I had to go do promos for it and got really blitzed – there were flames involved, you know, taking alcohol and lighting it on fire and drinking it, which is never a good idea. I had the worst hangover and I had my first match on Thunder, and it was the very first time I had ever wrestled Rick Flair. So here I am wrestling a legendary guy with the worst hangover. I remember the first fall that I took, I felt like my head was going to explode. I didn’t even want to get up off the mat, it was so bad. I just remember trying to peel myself off the mat, just like, “It’s Flair! Get up, get up, get up! It’s live TV, get up, get up, get up!” And of course that show went fine, but I definitely paid the price for it.
What was your first car?
A ’76 Volare that I had bought for $400 bucks off a guy that worked at Canadian Tire in Canada, which was smart because I kept having to bring it back to him when it broke down like every couple days. It was bottle green and rust color, and it was rust color because it was literally rust.
Photo: Ethan Miller / Getty Images | Licensed to Alpha Media Group 2013
Do you have a scar that tells a story?
I have a scar on my right forearm – it’s a pretty long one actually, and it’s from when I was trying to do a shooting star press by myself in Knoxville in ’94. It was a big show that was going to happen for Smokey Mountain wrestling, and I was practicing on my own. I did a big shooting star press and kind of landed on my arm, and it looked really funky so I went to the hospital and they told me I have a broken arm. I went back to the arena and the promoter was just really freaking out and mad at me. I was like, “I’m still going to wrestle.” So I wrestle the match with a broken arm, which is one of the most amazing things you’ll ever see. And then I had to go to surgery to get a steel plate put in. But the funny thing was that I had been in that area for about three or four months, and hadn’t met any girls. That night after the show, I was covered in blood – because I got cut open – and I broke an arm, and I had to go to surgery the next day, and I’ll never forget there were these three super gorgeous Daisy Duke chicks that were like, “Want to come hang out with us?” And I couldn’t go because I had to go to the hospital for surgery.
Do you have a party trick?
Well, I can tie a cherry stem into a knot using my tongue. And sometimes if it’s a long enough cherry stem, I can get a double. That impresses the girls.
What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever put in your mouth?
Probably my foot, on a daily basis, when I say something stupid, but other than that, when I was younger, a jelly donut. You know like a big, powdered, filled, jelly donut? I think I put it all in my mouth just to see if I could.
And you could?
Yeah, I think I could, but then of course it never ends well when you do something like that.
What is the one thing to remember in a fist fight?
If you’re wearing a baseball cap, you take your baseball cap off and you hold it in front of the guy’s face and punch. That’s the best way to open up a fist fight, for sure. That’s a good old dirty trick for you.
Who was the last person to see you naked?
I think my daughter, she walked in the shower on me this morning. She’s 6, so it’s alright.
Finish this sentence: If I ruled the world for a day I would…
If I ruled the world for a day, I would create world peace, legalize marijuana, and get some really rad X-Ray goggles that I could see through all the chicks’ shirts with.
It seems like the second two things would actually lead to the first thing.
Good point, exactly!
Want more wrestling? Check out Diamond Dallas Page Wants You To Try DDP Yoga or WWE Wrestler Randy Orton Talks Stunts, Championships, and Legend-Killing