*Update: Turns out this was too good to be true and, apparently, was tweeted from a parody account.
The internet-famous adolescent tweeted, "I'm bout to be a millionaire at 14. Whatchu all doing with ur lives?"
A ridiculously long thread of tweets from various "racial spokespersons" ensued in a hilarious modern tribute to Dave Chappelle's classic "Racial Draft" sketch from Chappelle's Show, which the young Bregoli has likely never seen.
As she discovered, no one was willing to pick her. Not. One. Person.
After the aliens rejected her, a slew of other "representatives" from fictional communities chimed in, with all but the devil himself refusing to claim the brat as one of their own.
After the mean tweets finally ceased to roll in, Bregoli uncharacteristically had very little to say except, "Fuck y'all."
Hopefully she learned her lesson. No amount of money will make the internet OK with her acting like a giant brat—even if she is 14.
h/t: Bro Bible