ESPN’S Scorecenter App Wants to Make You Cry

If you give a puck about hockey, that is.

 If you give a puck about hockey, that is.

I am one of the 14 Americans who actively watch the NHL and is actively bummed that it isn’t taking up hours of my time that I am now forced to spend conversing with my family.


Most people who watch sports know that there is an NHL lockout going on—everyone, that is, except ESPN’s Scorecenter. Scorecenter is an app that gives users updated scores and upcoming game schedules of their favorite teams. So let me take a quick glance at my phone (not to brag, but I totally have an unlimited data plan) and see what’s coming up…Huh, according to ESPN’s Scorecenter,  my beloved New York Rangers will be doing battle with the Minnesota Wild. That’ll be a good one—IF IT WAS ACTUALLY HAPPENING. Guess what, Scorecenter? It isn’t and you’re stupid and I hate you!


Okay, on closer examination I see they’ve written “canc” on the start time.  I don’t care! Alerting me about a game I can never watch is like throwing a bag of pee at a drowning man. (It just doesn’t make the situation any better, is what I’m getting at.) So stop teasing us, Scorecenter, and stop locking out, NHL. I miss toothless smiles and fistfights and yelling “You suck!” at men wearing ice skates.

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