How To Throw Your Helmet In the Dugout (And How Not To)

There’s a right and a wrong way to sling baseball equipment. Allow these men to demonstrate. 

Two pissed off baseball players provided useful lessons on how to angrily throw a batting helmet in the dugout this week. And really, there’s something to learn here for anyone who’s ever thrown an object in anger. Say, a Playstation remote after a FIFA loss or a Big Mac when you ordered a Quarter Pounder.

The first lesson, demonstrating the right way to do things, comes courtesy Jung Ho Kang, the Pirates infielder who’s quietly putting together a fantastic rookie year. After Paul Goldschmidt did him dirty with a sensational double play last night, Kang went back into the dugout and fired his helmet at bucket of gum. It produced a bubble gum explosion, that, when viewed in slo-mo, is as beautiful as anything you’ll see on a baseball field. It was an unexpected visual delight in the middle of the grueling, 15-inning, mid-August baseball game. 

The lesson: When slinging your helmet, throw it at an intimate object, preferably one that will do something cool when it’s hit. 

On the other end of the spectrum, there’s Justin Upton. After getting caught in a rundown—or Pickle for all you Sandlot fans out there—Upton returned to the dugout on Saturday and tossed his helmet over his shoulder, nailing teammate Yonder Alonso in the head. Oops. Alonso was irate and had to be taken out of the game, though he showed some good humor about it the next day. 

Once again, the lesson: When slinging your helmet, throw it at an intimate object, preferably one that won’t bleed when it’s hit.