Free-agent NFL quarterback Johnny Manziel, who has as much chance of throwing a touchdown pass in the 2016 NFL season as you do, turned himself in to police Wednesday and was booked on misdemeanor assault charges. He posted bond and was released, but not before smirking in his mugshot like you knew he would.
Later in the day, in a trademark display of insincerity, he managed to make a joke out of the whole thing, tweeting, "Just thankful I had a shirt this time,” a reference to a mugshot taken after a 2012 arrest. Naturally, the tweet was quickly deleted.
Manziel appeared in front of a Dallas judge on Thursday, where he was ordered to stay away from ex-girlfriend Colleen Crowley, who he allegedly assaulted in January. A grand jury indicted Manziel last month after hearing about the night in question, in which Crowley accused the 23-year-old of kidnapping her, smacking her around and threatening to kill her.
Manziel was mostly quiet and contrite during the hearing. He nodded to the judge and agreed to stay away from Crowley. But if you thought this might be a turning point for Manziel, that he might realize why it's a bad look to go to a Justin Bieber concert on the night after his indictment, that he would see why spending more time in bars than gyms is bad for his career, that he would soon turn over a new leaf—you're wrong.