Monday Morning Sports Rant: January 31, 2011

Maxim chats with sports blogger Drew Magary of Deadspin and Kissing Suzy Kolber, about this weekend’s athletic hits and misses.

Maxim chats with sports blogger Drew Magary of Deadspin and Kissing Suzy Kolber, about this weekend’s athletic hits and misses.

Jbrukman: So how do you think Jeff Fisher’s firing effects America’s favorite shirtless QB, Vince Young.

Bigdaddydrew:  I think it’s gonna be really interesting to see if anyone trades for him, especially given what a complete disaster the McNabb trade was.

The rule of thumb in the NFL now is this: NEVER shop for brand name players. You’re always better off trying to develop your own, either via the draft or via low key free agency.

Drew Brees is pretty much the exception.

Jbrukman:  Matt Cassel seems to have been an OK decision, but I guess one could argue he wasn’t really a brand name.

Yeah, plus he only got a one year deal from KC. There wasn’t some huge commitment made.

The other thing is that Young still has FAR too high of an opinion of himself, never a good sign. If you’re gonna take a chance on Vince Young, you want him humbled, and insecure, and basically an empty husk of a human being

By the way, don’t you think every NFL team has already put a “VINCE YOUNG” alert on Cam Newton’s draft report?

It’s like, “Well, this guy’s gonna end up sulking on a sideline somewhere.”

Jbrukman:  Oh, this just in from ESPN, Aaron Rodgers: “Everything is cool” regarding team-photo controversy

I know you were concerned.

That’s the lamest controversy ever. We need Joey Porter to barge in this week and start stabbing people

Bigdaddydrew:  By the way, I’ve said it before: If you’re taking a football team photo, the money pose is always to bury your head as far inside your neck as possible. Really try and make that neck look wide as possible. Britney Spears wide. She’s got a neck like a rhino.

Jbrukman:  I’ve always said the same thing! Britney Spears’ neck is really the silent shameAmerica refuses to talk about.

Bigdaddydrew:  Isn’t it?  It’s as thick as her head!  She’s her own travel pillow!

Jbrukman:  How about that Pro Bowl? My whole theory about that useless game is this—no matter when you have it, no matter how much you incentivize (not a word) actual competitive play, you still will never get a good game.

Because football is just too complicated. You can’t throw a bunch of players together for a week and expect them to execute some complicated shit.

Bigdaddydrew:  Of course not. But the NFL knows that. It is what it is. Essentially, it’s a goodbye party for the season. Take a look at Philip Rivers one more time America, before we put him back into frozen vinegar storage.

Jbrukman:  Are you a fan of the Pro Bowl coming before the Super Bowl now? Uninterrupted football until the end of the season is kinda nice, I guess

Bigdaddydrew:  I don’t like it because it makes me feel like the season is already over.

The Pro Bowl is used so that you see it for five seconds and are like, “Well, I don’t need football now.”

I don’t want to feel that right before the Super bowl.

Jbrukman:  In your column for our February issue, you told readers to not throw a Super Bowl party. So what’s your plan for this Sunday?

Bigdaddydrew:  Make chili. Watch game.

I have the great misfortune of my daughter’s birthday ALWAYS falling on Super bowl weekend. MEN: Calibrate your babymaking. I feel like such an idiot.

Jbrukman:  Any predictions for the game? Score? Injuries? What planes we get for the fly over this year (I feel like ever since, you know, all those wars and what not, the quality of jet for the flyovers as seriously weakened)

Bigdaddydrew:  Don’t we usually get a stealth fighter?  One of those planes that looks like Tetris piece?  I like those.

They should go retro.


They should also drop one bomb. Just for posterity.

Jbrukman:  If it could only hit Jerry Jones, I’m all for it.

Bigdaddydrew:  Concur.