NHL Players Provide Needed Relief From The World’s Woes By Punching Each Other in the Face

War and strife are global problems, but there’s still no competition quite like a fist fight on ice.

Hockey fights are worthwhile and important for many reasons. For instance, during the Oscars, while the most glamorous people in Hollywood did their hair and makeup, professional hockey players spent Sunday giving each other eyeshadow the old-fashioned way. It was a big day for fights as the zebras got skittish and back away from the bare-knuckle contest breaking out in almost every matchup across the league. Was there some sort of conspiracy to make a big night for television into fight night? Probably not, but NHL stars know how to steal the spotlight.

Here’s our analysis of the best recent fights:

Jason Chimera vs Zac Rinaldo

Anaylsis: Chimera is going for a classic look here, rocking the traditional red, white and blue while using his bulk to put Rinaldo, clad in a tasteless orange, on the ice in front of his own bench. A really great statement from a strong swinger.

Brenden Morrow vs Nate Guenin

Anaylsis: Thought Nate Guenin look excellent in oxblood, a very “in” color this season, he’s spending to much time on the boards. Meanwhile, Morrow is allowing to much abuse to his face. Hope he gets along with his dentist!

Adam McQuaid vs Daniel Carcillo

Anaylsis: A lot of circling before the fight doesn’t look good, but come swinging time McQuaid really shined. Was Carcillo seriously injured? Probably not, but there will be lasting effects!

Brian Boyle vs Cody McLeod

Anaylsis: Mcleod wins the day by making the terrible decision to fight Boyle, who is massive, then winning. A real come-from-behind, David-and-Goliath story. Hollywood stuff, really.