Sit down, we have to tell you something. All those years you spent watching pro wrestlers pound the living sin out of each other? Every time you saw Shawn Michaels make sweet chin music? That one time you watched Diamond Dallas Page and Jake The Snake Roberts do yoga? It's all a bunch of phooey. (Well, except for the yoga. That, unfortunately, is very, very real.) The wrestling stuff, though, is just a big, fat lie. If you don't believe us, just watch the video below, which captures wrestlers telling their opponents what moves are coming. The only genuine rage you'll see in the video is directed toward the fans. Somewhere, a little kid is traumatized after hearing CM Punk tell him, "I hope your parents die." Ouch for real.
Next we'll tell you that Santa Claus isn't real.