The Tao of Dirty Dancing

Never underestimate the brilliance of a shitty Patrick Swayze movie.

Groin-grinding choreography aside, ancient Chinese wisdom and the perky nubs of a pre-nose-job Jennifer Grey make DD a classic.

Johnny:“The steps aren’t enough—you have to feel the music.”

Meaning: Johnny (Swayze) demonstrates to Baby (Grey) the principle of Oneness: Lose yourself in the song and become the dance. There’s no old nose or new nose, just one nose.

Johnny: “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.”

Meaning: Baby doesn’t stagnate—she evolves through a public display of her new mambo skills, a boost in confidence that can otherwise be achieved only through rhinoplasty.

Johnny: “Last month I’m eating Jujubes to stay alive. This month women are stuffing diamonds in my pocket.”

Johnny accepts Dynamic Balance and his coexisting dualities. Costarring in a huge blockbuster doesn’t mean you won’t be relying on candy for sustenance again.

Johnny: “All it is is one-two-three-four, one-two-three-four.”

Meaning: In breaking down the mambo into a simple rhythm, Johnny illustrates Harmonious Action. Strength is gained through action; big Semitic honker is replaced by WASPy button nose.