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In last night’s NBA Draft (Commissioner David Stern’s last, by the way), the Cleveland Cavaliers selected Anthony Bennett number one overall. He’s an undersized power forward and almost exactly the same kind of player they drafted two years ago in Tristan Thomas (number four overall). The pick made Bill Simmons do this face live on air, and nobody seems to know who Bennett is…so let’s find out with the “help” of Twitter!
Yep, there’s a lot of that going around these days.
So he’s Canadian? That’s…good? Right?
Okay! Getting more specific! But does he, how you say, “play basketball”?
Well that’s not very nice! But at least we know he played ball at the same college as Larry Johnson! That’s pretty cool.
And he’s bigger than Larry Johnson!
Well that doesn’t sound too terrible!
But that’s not great!
Hmm, interesting. Well, it looks like we’ve got a pretty good idea about who this kid is!
Sigh. By the way, every single person (professional press and otherwise) we just quoted here spelled Bennett’s name wrong.
Check out our interview with Shane Battier and 4 NBA Teams Who Wish They Lost the Lottery.