The Deadpool star acquired the company behind Wine Enthusiast's top-rated gin earlier this year, and his new commercial's tone is absolutely in the same vein of the snarky superhero he plays on the silver screen.
“I take my responsibilities as owner of Aviation Gin seriously," he said of the video. "This does not extend to our marketing, however, which I take as unseriously as humanly possible."
As Reynolds jokingly describes it, distillers start their day with four hours of sunrise meditation before hydrating fruit using a very peculiar liquid.
"The citrus fruits are misted using only the tears of Aviation's owner: me, Ryan Reynolds."
He also assures viewers that six of the gin's seven botanicals are grown in humane, "cage-free" conditions. Unfortunately for the juniper berries, their pungent flavor has to literally be beaten out of them to produce the spirit's smooth, refined taste.
Bottles are then ordained by a Unitarian pastor and serenaded by fellow Canadian entertainer Sarah McLachlan before shipping.
"Some might call this overkill," Reynolds concludes. "But the next time you murder a silky smooth Aviation martini...well, who's the killer now, asshole?"
Aviation Gin sells for $30. Visit their website to find a retailer near you.
For more of Reynolds' signature schtick, check out the latest Once Upon A Deadpool trailer here.