Ahh, morning sex. The laziest of all lays. You wake up in the morning all warm and hazy, and you roll over and look at the beautiful woman angelically sleeping next to you. Sure, she might have putrid morning breath and drool caked on her face, but you don't care—you just really want to have sex with her, thanks to your morning wood.
And guess what? You should oblige your morning wood every single time it blesses you with its presence, because morning sex is some of the best sex you can have. Why? Well, because 1) hedonism, and 2) morning sex is really good for your health!
Now, I doubt you need much convincing to get it on more often, but in case you do, here are five really important reasons why you should have lots and lots of morning sex. You'll thank us later.
1. Morning sex is good for your heart.
According to biochemist Dr. Musa Yakubu of the University of Ilorin, having sleepy morning sex is really, really good for your heart health! It lowers blood pressure and reduces your risk of having a heart attack, so yeah, it’d be wise to indulge in a nice morning romp before you get on with your day. Doctor’s orders.
2. Sex is fun.
Another huge reason you should have more morning sex is because it’s fun. Seriously. Who wouldn’t love starting their day with basically the most enjoyable activity known to man?
3. You have a 0 percent chance of being plagued by whiskey dick.
Unless you wake up still drunk, or you’re chug a couple stiff drinks literally as soon as you wake up (which is unlikely), you won’t have any trouble getting it up. Hooray! So, even if you had a little trouble in that department last night thanks to all those cocktails you dumped down your throat, you won’t have any problems in the morning.
4. It wakes you up better than coffee.
Considering most of us are a little slow in the head when we first wake up, what better way to get up and running than a little morning nookie? “A huge amount of brain stimulus occurs during intercourse,” says Dr. Arun Ghosh, a general practitioner who specializes in the health benefits of sex. “It's why we feel so overtaken when we orgasm.”
“When researchers do MRI scans on people in orgasm, they observe both sides of the brain being stimulated, including parts of the brain we wouldn't normally use.”
Well, you heard the doctor. Who needs coffee when you can just have sex? Nobody.
5. Sex is basically exercise, so you can skip the gym that day.
Hate the gym? I don’t blame you. I hate it too. And lucky for you, we have a fantastic alternative—morning sex! Or sex any time of day, for that matter.
According to WebMD, a 30-minute sex sesh burns around 90 calories, and the longer you last, the more calories you’ll burn, obviously. Plus, studies show that sex increases your heart rate and respiratory rate, so sex is clearly exercise. Case closed.
Hopefully you’ll put your morning wood to good use from now on, my friends. Because like I said, morning sex is the best sex.