Women Are Turned On By Men Who Drink PBR and Shun Cargo Shorts, Says New Dating App Study

If you want to get laid, you might want to read this.

For the greater majority of us, dating is a bitch. Even with the help of all those dating apps out there, it’s still hard. You know, getting past the awkward first date, figuring out the perfect time to kiss her, and then keeping her interested…all hard work.

But before any of that can happen, you need to match with her on the dating app you’re using, be it Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, or whatever you prefer to use. And for that to happen, you need to have a fantastic profile. But just what makes a profile appealing? Hmmm.

According to a new study by dating app Hater, which matches singles based on things they mutually hate, there are certain things about men that women find attractive on dating apps.

For the study, analysts categorized dudes who use dating apps into two groups: men who get a lot of right-swipes, and men who don’t get too many right-swipes. In other words, highly desirable dudes, and dudes that women don’t care about.

Then, the researchers looked at what the differences were between the two types of men, and found some very interesting results. This is important, so pay close attention, okay?

First and foremost, it was discovered that women are seriously turned off by cargo shorts. I repeat: women are turned off by cargo shorts. Are you surprised? I’m not. Cargo shorts are gross. Don’t wear them.

It was also found that women are turned the hell off by men who like anime, Pokemon Go, and Windows computers. I totally understand the anime and Pokemon Go, but in all fairness, Windows computers aren’t all that bad.

Anyway, when you add two and two together, you can kinda picture the type of man women swipe left on. He’s the weird dude who’s obsessed with hentai and says shit like “Notice me, senpai.” Don’t be that guy.

Next, and also equally important, the data showed that women have the major hots for dudes who drink PBR. Why? I’m not sure. But just know that it turns women on. Turns out everyone’s favorite watery hipster brew just does something to the ladies. Go figure. 

Another thing that makes women swipe right are men who love superfoods, like kale and goji berries, or something. However, as much as women love men who fuel their bodies with acai bowls and and colorful vegetables, they also like men who take care of their hangovers with a hair of the dog.

Lastly, the most right-swiped men were found to be those who dress from J.Crew, or in other words, look like they’re about to get on a sailboat and sail around Monaco. Typical nautical bro.

Wow, that was a lot of info, so let’s recap:

Do: Drink PBR, eat chia seed pudding and beets and stuff, and dress like you’re from Martha’s Vineyard. Seems like women are into that.

Don’t: Watch anime, wear cargo shorts, or play Pokemon Go. Basically, don’t be the weird variety of geeky. That’s not hot. Smart-geeky is fine, but weird-geeky isn’t. 

H/T: Mashable