How to Keep Track of Your Dates
There’s nothing wrong with playing the field. Just work on your fundamentals.
If you’re playing the field, remember that you’re not the only one. Lots of women date around before they get exclusive and a lot of them are better at it than you. We pooled advice from those girls, and here are their recommendations. Out of the mouths of babes…
From the first time you meet a chick or exchange numbers online, set yourself up for success. When you save her number in your phone, be sure to write down her first name, last name, and the place you met (for example: “Jane Doe, OKCupid,” or “Jane Doe/Irish Pub/Tight White Dress”). Be sure to change these titles later, but at least you won’t confuse one hookup with another, and you can reference the connection when you send an obligatory follow-up text.
If you’re interested in several girls with the same name, give them nicknames (that you can say to their faces, as well as with the lights out in your sexiest voice). Say the name enough, and it will stick. Think of all of the Elizabeths you can juggle with this method (Bet, Bee, Etta, Izzy…) and girls usually like nicknames, so coming up with a unique one will actually earn you points.
By the third or fourth date, recalling who you told what and when at which restaurant will begin to suck. Try to pair your stories with hers so that you’ll have a better chance of remembering. If she tells a story about streaking, tell her one of your stories about streaking. You’ll have an easier time remembering what she said than what you said. And get good at apologizing for repeating yourself, because you will. You may also forget small details about these women—who loves to have sex on the dining room table and who prefers the stairs—so going over your messages/texts before a date will provide context clues. Don’t be afraid to jot down notes.
Be sure to keep your place clean at all times—the worst thing you can do is leave a used condom next to your bed. Try to vary the restaurants you take dates to, because no girl wants to run into you with a second date at the same restaurant you just took her to the day prior. After a few dates, you’ll also probably want to check whether your dates are Facebook friends. Girls talk.
The key to any relationship, even a hookup, is honesty. You don’t need to tell a date that you’re seeing other people over your first beer, but do tell her after a few dates (or if she asks) that you want to keep things casual for a while. Girls like a façade of control. Most women will value your openness. They’re probably trying to remember what stories they’ve already told you and what sexual promises they’ve made. If they persist (and they might) in trying to define the relationship, tell them that you would be more than happy to talk about exclusivity again in a few weeks. Do that.
Every herd, if you’ll pardon the indelicacy, requires occasional culling. If you do realize a girl has begun to have serious feelings for you and you don’t feel the same way, end the relationship quickly and respectfully. Though technically you can reiterate that you weren’t looking for something serious from day one, it’s better to not play that card unless you want to be called a selfish dick. If that’s your thing, there are other approaches you can take.
Although the dating scene can be fun for a while, you’ll eventually need to make choices or find a new set of candidates to outfit with fresh new nicknames. If you’re stuck between a girl who’s good in bed and a girl you like to be with, keep looking. It’s tempting to end up in a relationship with an amalgam of two people. These relationship end badly because people that don’t exist make miserable girlfriends.
You will know when the right person comes along, because no matter how determined you are to stick to your rotation, you will find yourself planning multiple dates a week with her. You will remember everything she’s told you about her family, and you won’t need a nickname to keep her straight.
When you find that girl, inform the other girls (or go rogue and suffer though the incessant calls and emails), delete their phone numbers, and for God’s sake, burn your notes.
Photos by Nikada / Getty Images