Do You Live in the Masturbation Capital of America? - Maxim

Do You Live in the Masturbation Capital of America?

Only one way to find out.
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Photo: Getty Images

Photo: Getty Images

A little self-love never hurt anyone. Well, unless you do it so frequently your body gets desensitized and it becomes increasingly difficult to orgasm through other means. Or, if you're a woman (since the prevailing narrative is that masturbation is somehow still taboo), much fanfare is made over publicizing the dialogue, thereby further cementing said narrative in the first place. Then a little self-love can hurt you. But other than that it's a boringly normal bodily function and pretty much everyone does it.

But some do it more than others. "Where," you might impatiently demand. "Where are those places??" Sit back, good sir, and you shall be delighted with the latest sexy tidbit from SKYN Condom's Millennial Sex Survey. It turns out, the winner is Georgia, where 15% of respondents get intimate with themselves several times a day. Michigan is also right up there: only 12% masturbate several times a day, but 34% of those surveyed from the land of the Great Lakes do the deed at least once a day if not more.

My theory that the states who jerk it the most correlate with those getting laid the least holds true in the case of sad, repressed Connecticut. Thirty-two percent of CT-dwellers masturbate at least once a day (if not more)—the third most slap happy state of the lot. Given the fact that 5% of those from Connecticut have sex fewer than several times a year, it's not surprising to see an uptick in their manual activities. 

Okay, so if America were an episode of Seinfeld, who would win the bet? Apparently, those in Utah: 20% claim they never, ever crank the love pump. Since this study is self-reported, and oh, I don't know, the fact that masturbating is a big ol' sin according to the Church of Latter Day Saints, and there are over half a million Mormons in Salt Lake City Alone, I'd take that data with a grain of salt...lake.

And there you have it—the low down on how our country self-soothes. Be sure to check out SKYN's Heat Map to read real time social chatter about sex around the US, and check back for more scintillating data in the days to come.