“A clean house is a happy house,” they say. But that’s not the entire idiom, ya know. It goes on to say: “…but a house cleaned by a sexy nude woman is an even happier house.” You should also know that I made that up, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s true.
If you’ve ever had a girlfriend or fuck buddy or someone like that make pancakes and wash dishes while totally naked, you know it’s a joy to watch. It completely transforms a mundane task into something absolutely riveting that you just cannot wait for.
And that’s why there are nude cleaning services, like the one in London you’ve probably heard about called Naturist Cleaners, where a pretty lady comes to your house, strips down to her birthday suit, and scrubs your floors and folds your laundry while you look on with a shit-eating grin on your face.
“There is nothing out there that even comes close to the unique, fun and exciting experience of hiring a maid for a nude cleaning service,” their website reads, stating the obvious. Well, yeah, I'm sure we'd all get get our jollies from watching a hot naked woman properly fold a fitted sheet.
Don’t live in London but still want your house cleaned by a naked lady? No worries, there are plenty of other nude cleaning services where that came from!
For instance, I think you might enjoy Topless Cleaning Services, which has branches in Australia and Spain. As the name suggests, the cleaning ladies are topless, which is a really great thing. But what makes it even better is that they wear skimpy French maid aprons, and it really reminds me of porn. And I don't think you could ever go wrong with that.
There are also nude maid services in the U.S., such as Elegant Cleaning by Design, which “provides you with a clean home or office while watching a beautiful women do the cleaning in lingerie, topless or nude.”
"It’s the kind of experience you never forget," Naturist Cleaners wrote on its blog. "It’s the kind of experience that can keep a huge smile on your face for the rest of the week."
That's right! It might also distract you from your work, but that's okay.