Kick your own ass (into shape)

We sent Maxim writer Jesse to throw himself on the mercy of Sergeant Simmons (he soon found she had none).

Apparently, chicks dig guys who don’t look like big balls of pasty dough. Which sucks for us, but hey, you’ve still got time to get ready. We sent Maxim writer Jesse to throw himself on the mercy of Sergeant Simmons (he soon found she had none).