Major Websites Like PornHub Are Pissing Off the Internet Today by Protesting for Net Neutrality

It involves really slow porn, so you might want to read this.

It’s July 12th, which means today is the big day! It’s the internet’s “Day of Action,” which is a protest organized by Fight for the Future, freepress, and Demand Progress, against the impending threat to free and open internet.

What this means is that if you’re planning on watching a little bit of porn today on PornHub, or perhaps a movie on Netflix, you’re in for a real treat, because a lot of your favorite sites might be a little fucked up today to protest the attack on net neutrality.

The protest, which over 60 companies including PornHub, Amazon, Netflix, and Reddit are also joining, is against FCC chief and former Verizon executive Ajit Paj’s attack on net neutrality, and the proposal to “remove the classification of broadband as a telecommunications service, a ruling made in 2015 to ensure stronger protections for an open internet.”

To clarify, net neutrality ensures independence for the web, and allows it to be open and uncensored. Without net neutrality, some websites, based on their content, would load at a glacial pace, or simply be blocked, and that’s not cool.

In other words, without net neutrality, the internet would be a sad, sad place, and we probably wouldn’t be able to watch PornHub and jerk off as freely as we do today. SO SAD.

VP at PornHub, Corey Price, told MotherBoard: “Without it, the cable and wireless companies that control Internet access will have unfair power to pick winners and losers in the market.” 

“Internet service providers could create special fast lanes for content providers willing to pay more,” he added, in an interview with BBC. “That means slow streaming, which, especially in regards to online porn, is quite problematic as you can imagine.”   

Today, sites like Spotify and Netflix are using banners with one of those annoying loading wheels, as well as a link to Internet Association where users can learn more and send a comment to the FCC, while PornHub, Facebook, and Netflix plan to use pop-ups, banners, and really slow loading times to show us all what the internet would be like without net neutrality.

I mean, can you imagine trying to watch porn and have that goddamn loading wheel interrupt you? No thanks!! Leave the porn alone, FCC!

“No one in the porn industry ever yells ‘slower, slower, slower. We’re much more accustomed to ‘faster, faster, faster.’ Here at PornHub, we want to keep it that way”, Price concluded.

Well, shit just got real, my friends. The ‘Day of Action’ is finally here, and the internet wants you to join the fight.