Teva Sandals Are Coming Back From the ’90s to Help Get You Not Laid

Oh God no.


Once maligned as out-of-fashion dadwear, another relic of ’90s normcore has made a comeback—the Teva sandal.

For dudes who aren’t afraid to rock sandals in the summer months, the return of the Teva should provide some sweet relief.

(Photo: Teva)

The Teva’s plentiful straps, which run along the sides of feet and wrap around the ankles, make the ’90s sandal easier to wear than most open-toed footwear. You get the sturdiness of a shoe but with breathing room.

(Photo: Teva)

While they are comfortable and dependable to a fault, wearers will have to pay the price of some seriously unsightly tan lines. 

(Photo: Teva)

Still, the fashion world’s embrace of the ’90s has brought about upgraded designs and buzzy Teva collaborations.

(Photo: Teva)

Perhaps the best reason to re-introduce the Teva to your closet comes, somewhat unexpectedly, from DJ Dillon Francis. Unlike our experience with the sandals back in the ’90s, he cites a shipment of new Tevas (or as he calls them, “Fuck Machines”) with helping him get laid.

Just be sure to remove your Tevas before actually boning.

h/t BroBible