Who Wants To Smell Like Pizza?

No one? Sorry, Pizza Hut.

No one? Sorry, Pizza Hut.

Love the smell that wafts out of a grease-soaked Pizza Hut box? Well, today might be your day. The beloved pizza chain recently released a fragrance line in the US after gaining popularity in Canada late last year. While there is only a limited supply of the fragrance, fancily deemed Eau de Pizza Hut, the pizza joint is giving you a chance to win it just in time for the holiday of love. Starting February 11th, Pizza Hut is asking intrigued consumers to tweet at @PizzaHut explaining why they’re deserving of a last minute V-Day gift. If you win, you’ll also receive a $20 gift card, so you can spend your Valentine’s Day the right way: sleeping on the couch (you didn’t think she’d actually go for that gift idea, did you?).

Although we’re sure someone out there would love smelling like a pizza – hello, Honey Boo Boo‘s family – let’s not pretend that this isn’t really fucking weird. And yet, as usual, there are worse fragrances out there. Below, a list of the most bizarre.

Vulva Fragrance

Unfortunately this is exactly how it sounds – the pervs of Vulva Original have created a scent reminiscent of an actual vagina. Instead of spraying this intensely creepy cologne on yourself, you could just go have sex…but hey, whatever you’re into.

Paper Passion Perfume

98 bucks to smell like a book? Are you fucking kidding me?! Instead, you could head down to your local library and rub the dusty paperbacks all over yourself for free. Sure, you may look like you have a fetish that hasn’t been properly named yet, but that’s better than throwing away a Benjamin on this bullshit.

Flame By BK

We won’t deny that Burger King has delicious burgers, but we would never want to smear it all over our bodies to capture the smell (it already lingers long enough as it is).

Wode by Boudicca

Perhaps the weirdest perfume concept ever, this fragrance is released as a blue paint that eventually blends into your skin. Righttt. What’s even more bizarre than someone buying this? The commercial to promote it. Check out the model who looks like a really turned-on avatar.

Smell Like Donald Trump

Girls With Red Pouts