Putin Accused of Spying at the G20 Summit, So Let’s Remember Sexy Russian Spy Anna Chapman

She can spy on us anytime she likes.

Two Italian newspapers have accused Russian President Vladimir Putin of spying on other world leaders at the recent G20 summit using USB flashdrive devices that were distributed to delegates as a courtesy to help charge their mobile phones. The drives were reportedly equipped with a Trojan Horse virus that was designed to secretly retrieve data from the phones and computers of the users and deliver it back to the Kremlin.


Though details remain sketchy, it seems that the goal of the spying effort was for the Russian government, aided by moles inside IMF, to acquire what is known as the NOC List – a highly encrypted secret file that contains the true identities of all American undercover agents in Eastern Europe. But the plan was thwarted by a rogue U.S. agent named Ethan Hunt with nothing to lose and a mission to accomplish.


Oh, wait, no – none of that happened. According to Putin, this is all a bunch of bullshit designed to distract from the Obama administration’s NSA spying scandal, which has faced added scrutiny this week with the revelation that the U.S. government was spying on German Chancellor Angela Merkel “but is totally done with all that, and c’mon guys can’t we just forget about it and go back to all that hope-changey stuff that was so fun a few years ago?”


We’re no experts, but we’re inclined to believe Putin, if only because we remember the beautiful Anna Chapman – undercover Russian spy-girl extraordinaire, who made headlines back in 2010 when her identity was uncovered and she was deported back to Russia, where she promptly posed for Maxim, because obviously. The point is, when it comes to Russian spies, it’s all about go big or go home. Why would you use a USB flashdrive and a covert spyware program when you have this girl at your disposal? Sure, it may not be the Clinton years, but something tells us that Anna could acquire a few international government secrets if she so pleased.

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