We hand out the awards MTV is afraid of.

There’s something awkward and wonderful about the combination of music and puppets, and yet where are the Puppet Video Music Awards? Thank God we’re here to help.

Most Obvious Puppets: The Polyphonic Spree, "Hold Me Now"

No one said puppetry had to be cunning. This looks like a 1st grade talent show, but on some level you have to respect that. They know they're puppets, we know they're puppets, and they're not trying to hide it, arm sticks and all.

Best Re-Use of a Puppet: Mr. Oizo, "Flat Beat"

The former spokes-puppet for Levi's, Flat Eric still has to pay the bills. He deals with important business, signing papers and making phone calls, but of course has time to headbang and um, blow dry his hair. The beat is mind numbing, but watching a puppet offer up what seems to be a hot dog cigar kind of makes the headache worth it.

Most Annoying Puppet: Lily Allen, "Alfie"

Little brothers are assholes, especially when made of felt and have a scary face. If you know someone that acts like this puppet, we feel for you. That said, Alfie’s life seems pretty great. Is he an asshole for being a jerk? Or are we the asshole for complaining about it? Puppets always make you wonder.

Creepiest Puppet: Interpol, "Evil"

Paul Banks' voice is already erie, so adding this puppet turns this video into fever dream. The puppet has no lips (but do puppets really ever have lips?), does a super creepy dance on a hospital bed, and those eyes.. oh those horrible, bulging eyes. The video was directed by Charlie White, who also took photographs such as this and this. And that’s why he’s not invited to our sleepover camping trip.

Most Badass Criminal Puppet: El-P, "The Full Retard"

Meet Mr. Killums, the eye-patch wearing rodent buddy of El-P. He smokes, he drinks, he does drugs, he hooks up with ladies of the mid-day. His ridiculousness and lust for debauchery makes him more likeable than that stuck up Big Bird and that teetotaling Elmo. Mr. Killums does the things you've thought about doing, if it weren't for that whole jail/death/disease thing.