As we speak, all over the nation, lingerie football players' bras and panties are flying at half staff. Normally, this would be good news, but unfortunately, it's to mourn the loss of the nation's only female model underwear sport. It seems that the Lingerie Football League is going the way of the dodo, the dinosaur and the $10 lap dance. The LFL announced that they are completely revamping the league's sport by dropping the "lingerie" aspect of the game and replacing it with a more traditional football league called the "Legends Football League." The teams will still feature female athletes, but they will wear more traditional uniforms with additional protection (not that kind) and focus on the art of playing the sport, rather than the art of playing the sport nearly naked.
All jokes aside, we sincerely hope that this new vision of female football is a success. The world could use more mature sporting traditions that focus on the effort of the sport rather than the egotistical achievement of the players. That's right, Major League Baseball, we're looking at you.