These 20 Superfoods Are Guaranteed To Make You Better In Bed
This is a diet plan we can get behind.
Two questions for you:
1. Do you love eating?
2. Do you love having sex?
If you answered yes to either—or both—questions, I have great news: There are certain delicious foods out there that will totally give you a boost below the belt. They will make you better in bed, so you might want to pay attention then take a little trip to the grocery store.
Steak is delicious, so this is great news. I’m very pleased.
Red meat contains iron and protein – two things that are very important for energy levels and stamina. If you’re feeling tired and sluggish during sex, it isn’t going to be much fun for you, or for her.
For the sake of a good romp, cook yourself a nice steak before heading into the bedroom. Your sex life and your taste buds will thank you.
Asparagus contains the B vitamin folate, which is essential for blood flow and circulation. Guess what happens when you have great circulation? Your boners become extra hard, which is great for everyone.
Asparagus makes your pee smell, but that’s a small price to pay for industrial strength boners.
According to researchers at the San Francisco Insititute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, men who included oats in their daily diet for just 8 weeks had seriously high sex drives compared to dudes who didn’t eat oats.
Oats increase the amount of testosterone—the horny hormone—in your bloodstream.
4. Chili peppers
Thanks to the capsaicin in chili peppers, chili flakes in your dinner might be all you need for a steamy night with your lady. Capsaicin is what makes peppers spicy, but that burn in your mouth means increased blood flow and sensitivity, making for a wicked passionate make-out sesh.
Chilies also mimic arousal by increasing your heart rate and stimulate endorphins, making you feel pretty damn good.
A testosterone boost is going to increase your sex drive. Add the energy boost from the vitamin B for better stamina and you can have sex longer, with more gusto.
Fact: alcohol makes you horny. Another fact: in moderation, champagne will get you the perfect amount of tipsy, without giving you whiskey dick. Yay!
Thanks to the carbonation in a glass or four of some bubbly, you’ll feel the effects of alcohol quicker. You won’t need to drink as much, and that means you’re going on a trip to bonertown, so it’s time to pop some bottles.
Since the time of the Aztecs, avocados have been considered a powerful aphrodisiac, probably because it’s shaped like a thicc and curvy woman.
According to Barbara Klein, a professor of food and nutrition at the University of Illinois, avocados contain very high levels of vitamin E, which works wonders for your sex life, helping to maintain “youthful vigor and energy levels.”
Ah, water. The blandest of all liquids, yet the most important. Without water, we would all die…and so would your penis.
When you’re dehydrated, your bits and pieces aren’t going to work very efficiently, so always remember to drink enough water throughout the day.
The stinkiest of herbs, garlic will make your breath smell like ass. It’s worth it, my good sir.
Garlic is high in the organosulphuric compound allicin, which increases blood flow, and increased blood flow means amazing boners for you, and heightened sensitivity for her.
Celery stimulates the pituitary gland, which is one of the most important glands for the release of sex hormones.
Celery also contains the hormone androsterone, which is also found in sweat, and turns women on. In a way, celery is kind of like musk. Women love musk.
The sacred fruit of Aphrodite, pomegranates have been used as an aphrodisiac since the time of the Ancient Greeks. They are the symbol of fertility, romance, and popping your cherry.
Aside from historical symbolism, pomegranates increase testosterone and lower cortisol, which translates to stress-free and muy horny.
Fun fact: the word “aphrodisiac” comes from Aphrodite.
Honey contains boron, a mineral that regulates estrogen and testosterone. Both are crucial for your sex drive. If you have low testosterone and high estrogen, your libido isn’t going work right.
If they’re regulated and holding steady at the proper levels, your sex drive will be through the roof.
That’s not all — honey also boosts energy levels, which is always a plus.
If you want to do something nice for your penis, eat some fish, because it’s super high in vitamin B, which is really, really good for your manhood.
Vitamin B3 is responsible for anaerobic metabolism, which deals with increasing blood flow (again with the blood flow). Vitamin B6 regulates your levels of prolactin, the hormone that makes sex wonderfully enjoyable.
Here we go with the circulation thing again: Strawberries are high in vitamin C, the magic vitamin that keeps blood flowing to all necessary parts of your body. Most importantly for our purposes here, your dick.
Just as with strawberries, kiwis are loaded with immune and blood flow-boosting vitamin C. Your boners will high-five you for eating them.
Rumored to be Cleopatra’s favorite fruit, figs symbolize sexuality and modesty, as seen by Adam and Eve. They’re also chock-full of potassium, flavonoids, and antioxidants.
But if you’re looking for a night of steamy lovemaking, don’t go overboard with the figs – too much will give you the poops. Horrible poops. Guaranteed.
The tame, boring little brother of marijuana*, hemp is insanely good for you, thanks to the large amounts of essential fatty acids it contains, which is crucial for healthy hormone production.
Put hemp seeds in a smoothie, or sprinkle some over a salad. You can even find hemp milk and whip up some libido-boosting lattes with it.
*No, it won’t get you high. Sorry. Pot is good for your sex drive, too, so go ahead and toke up.
Walnuts are superfoods for your heart and your junk, high in circulation-boosting omega 3 and vitamin E.
Just a handful, and your body will thank you.
Eggs are high in vitamins B5 and B6, both of which help balance hormones and manage stress. And we all know stress is like Kryptonite for your penis. It literally cock blocks you.
Eggs also contain healthy amounts of good cholesterol, which gives you a nice boost of testosterone. As I’ve pointed out before, more testosterone = more horny.
Maca, a root herb that grows in the Andes, is known to boost libido, as well as increase sperm count and improve fertility. There have been numerous studies confirming the aphrodisiac properties of maca, and a Peruvian study revealed that just 3 grams of the root per day made men in the study a lot hornier.
20. Dark chocolate
Dark chocolate contains phenylethylamine, which acts as a nervous system stimulant that is released in the brain when you fall in love. It mimics the pleasure endorphins released during sex.
So, clearly, chocolate is a great dessert option on date night. Trust.