People Who Eat Meat Are Happier Than Vegetarians and Vegans, Delicious New Study Finds

Are you in the least bit surprised?

Those who abstain from eating meat are slimmer, live longer and waste fewer resources, but boy… do their lives seem joyless!

A study from across the pond found that our otherwise jolly counterparts—the British—are sadder when they don’t eat meat.

I mean, just look how blissfully happy model Juliana Herz looks devouring this turkey leg:

The study, which reviewed the eating habits of 10,000 Britons and was published in the Journal of Affective Disorders, determined that vegetarians and vegans were up to twice as likely to suffer from depression. 

Researchers caution that meatless diets often lack in vitamin B12, which may be linked to ailing mental health. They found that over half of the vegans and 7 percent of the vegetarians surveyed were B12 deficient.

Our theory: not being able to eat steak is fucking sad.