NFL Week 2: MaximBet’s Betting Odds and Predictions

Win easy money with the lock of the week or go nuts with a four-team parlay that could turn $10 to $519.

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Well, that was something. The opening week of any NFL season is cause for celebration, but I have to say, that might have been the best Week 1 in my lifetime.

There were so many great games, so many upsets. And so much money to be made (MaximBet probably made a few Benjamins…) in the process, as I predicted a lot those upsets.

The fact that the New York Jets missing a two-point conversion was the only thing that kept me from batting 1.000 as I delivered your handpicked betting suggestions after navigating the lines at MaximBet, was pretty dang spectacular. Hell, if the Jets had scored another touchdown, we would have hit on that $10 parlay for a $426 payout!

I guess what I’m trying to say here, and I mean it from the bottom of my heart, fuck the Jets. You were the one hitch in the perfect plan.

But I’m back again to give it another go. We’ve got 17 more weeks to work with. We were so close to perfection to open the season. But much like a Jets offensive lineman trying to block a Carolina Panthers pass rusher, it just slipped right through our grasp.

Poor Zach Wilson was sacked six times. The kid’s a Mormon. I think that means he’s got to marry one of those guys now, or at least introduce them to one of his sisters. I don’t know. I’m not really up on newest Latter-Day Saints doctrine.

For us, as humans and gamblers, perfection simply might not be attainable. But that doesn’t mean we can’t strive for it. So, I have once again combed through the odds at MaximBet, and I now lay this cornucopia of wagers out before you.

Lock of the Week 

I know what you’re seeing. I’m seeing it too.

Detroit Lions at Green Bay Packers (-11.5)

But here’s the thing, as we discussed just a couple of days ago, the Pack was historically bad in Week 1. Yes, it’s just one game and everything can turn around. They’re playing in Lambeau and the home fans will be feeling it.

But I am uncomfortable with that line. I am uneasy because of how close the Detroit Lions came to blowing our lock last week in garbage time. So just look away. Pretend it’s a guy at a cellphone kiosk you’re walking past at the mall. Don’t even acknowledge it. Look at your watch. Pretend to take a call. We need to give both these teams another week or two before we can figure them out.

So, that’s not your lock. Here is your lock: 

New England Patriots (-6) at the New York Jets

Remember when I said “fuck the Jets” up there? Well, I meant it. Their offensive line couldn’t block The Golden Girls. And I’m not talking the Golden Girls in their prime, with Sofia, Blanche, Rose and Dorothy wreaking havoc in southern Florida, rampaging through every gin rummy game and shuffleboard match. I’m talking the Golden Girls now, where Betty White’s the only one left alive. She’d strip sack Zach Wilson at least twice.

Bill Belichick saw the same tape we did. He’s got a better defense than Carolina and, unlike last week when he matched wits with former assistant Brian Flores in Miami, Robert Saleh has never worked for him. This will be their first ever meeting on the football field.

Take the Pats and lay the points.

Worst Games of NFL Week 2 

Cincinnati Bengals at Chicago Bears (-1)

Cleveland Browns (-12.5) at Houston Texans

As we mentioned last week, not every one of the league’s 16 scheduled contests are of the “must watch” variety. For every “Kansas City Chiefs at Baltimore Ravens,” you have to balance out with the NFL equivalent of the TV at your doctor’s office being tuned to Nancy Grace trying to solve a 10-year-old murder by yelling at it.

There’s a narrative in Andy Dalton getting a revenge game against the Bengals, but no one is even the slightest bit interested in that. I told you last week Cincy was better than people think.

And everything the Rams exposed on the Bears defense remains there, and the Bengals have the wide receivers and quarterback to exploit it. We’ll probably see three quarterbacks play in this game and at least one of them get seriously booed by the home fans. And the recipient of those boos won’t be Joe Burrow.

Last week, the Browns had the Chiefs right where they wanted them, but then something Cleveland Browny happened. Of all the Cleveland Browns in the world, they remain the Cleveland Brown-iest.

I still think Cleveland is making the playoffs, but 12.5 points is a lot and the Texans proved they can make some big plays when they need to. The Browns are on the road again for the second consecutive week, and they will just be happy to get out of there with a solid 10-point victory. So…

Take the Bengals moneyline at +115 for a straight-up victory and/or the Texans at +12.5.

A Shocking Upset of the Seattle Seahawks? 

The Tennessee Titans were absolutely humiliated last week at home by the Arizona Cardinals, losing 38-13 in a game that felt a lot more like Alabama-Mercer the day before. 

But at least Mercer got paid well for their time. That ass whipping probably made their Athletic Department’s budget for the year. The Titans couldn’t even get their parking validated at their own stadium.

Last year, Seattle had the third-worst passing defense in the league, surrendering 278.2 yards per game. They did next to nothing to upgrade it this season and gave up 251 yards and two touchdowns to Carson Wentz last week, who hadn’t practiced since he was put on the COVID-19 protocol after being coughed on at a Kroger while thumping a casaba melon.

And do we really thing Derrick Henry is going to go three straight games (counting the divisional round of last year’s playoffs) without hitting 100 yards rushing?

Take the Titans on the spread at +5.5.

Drop $10 on a Four-Team Parlay 

There were a million things Alexander Hamilton hadn’t done, but if we hit this, winning a sweet ass parlay won’t be one of them.

I think we can build a little bit of magic here with some moneylines and, just like last week, we start by using some of our picks we already like: the Bengals (+115) and the Titans (+210).

We need two more and I think I found them: the Raiders (+211) and the Cowboys (+155).

Las Vegas is coming off a monster overtime win against the Baltimore Ravens in what might turn out to be one of the best games of the year. They dominated with their pass rush and made one gutsy offensive call after another. They’re playing at the Steelers, who stole one from the Bills thanks to a blocked punt.

If Dallas’ kicker Greg Zuerlein (who was coming off an injury) hit an extra point and just one of his two missed field goals in the NFL’s Kickoff Game, they would have knocked off the defending Super Bowl Champion Buccaneers in Tampa. Are the Los Angeles Chargers better than the Bucs?

A $10 four-team parlay bet win here pays $519.

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Adam Greene is @TheFirstMan on Twitter.